LH

"Lew Hodgett"

12/11/2008 8:54 AM

O/T: BANNED FROM WAL-MART

Enjoy

Lew

>.......................................................
BANNED FROM WAL-MART, HOME DEPOT, ETC

This is why women should not take men shopping against their will.

After I retired, my wife insisted that I accompany her on her trips to
Wal-Mart.

Unfortunately, like most men, I found shopping boring and preferred to
get in and get out.

Equally unfortunately, my wife is like most women - she loved to
browse.

Yesterday my dear wife received the following letter from the local
Wal-Mart:

Dear Mrs. Stevens,

Over the past six months, your husband has been causing quite a
ommotion in our store.

We cannot tolerate this behavior and have been forced to ban both of
you from the store.

Our complaints against Mr. Stevens are listed below and are documented
by our video surveillance cameras.

01) June 15:
Took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people's carts when
they weren't looking.

02) July 2:
Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute
intervals.

03) July 7:
Made a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the women's
restroom.

04) July 19:
Walked up to an employee and told her in an official voice, 'Code 3 in
Housewares. Get on it right away. '

05) August 4:
Went to the Service Desk and tried to put a bag of M&M's on layaway.

06) August 14:
Moved a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area.

07) August 15:
Set up a tent in the camping department and told other shoppers he'd
invite them in if they would bring pillows and blankets from the
bedding department.

08) August 23:
When a clerk asked if they could help him, he began crying and
screamed, 'Why can't you people just leave me alone?'

09) September 4:
Looked right into the security camera and used it as a mirror while he
picked his nose.

10) September 10:
While handling guns in the hunting department, he asked the clerk
where the antidepressants were.

11) October 3:
Darted around the store suspiciously while loudly humming the 'Mission
Impossible' theme.

12) October 6:
In the auto department, he practiced his 'Madonna look' by using
different sizes of funnels.

13) October 18:
Hid in a clothing rack and when people browsed through, yelled 'PICK
ME! PICK ME!'

14) October 21:
When an announcement came over the loud speaker, he assumed a fetal
position and screamed 'OH NO! IT'S THOSE VOICES AGAIN!'

And last, but not least .

15) October 23:
Went into a fitting room, shut the door, waited awhile, then yelled
very loudly, 'Hey! There's no toilet paper in here!'


This topic has 6 replies

Sk

"Swingman"

in reply to "Lew Hodgett" on 12/11/2008 8:54 AM

12/11/2008 9:35 AM

"Lew Hodgett" wrote

> This is why women should not take men shopping against their will.

SWMBO laughed at all but #3 ... go figure.

--
www.e-woodshop.net
Last update: 10/22/08
KarlC@ (the obvious)

KM

"Kerry Montgomery"

in reply to "Lew Hodgett" on 12/11/2008 8:54 AM

12/11/2008 12:00 PM


"Robatoy" <[email protected]> wrote in message
news:48b98583-ae40-4c8f-ab9b-5f1f18d8882f@t39g2000prh.googlegroups.com...
On Nov 12, 12:50 pm, "Swingman" <[email protected]> wrote:
> "Robatoy" wrote
>
> > (And Swing would appreciate this, he could squeeze more bandwidth out of
> > a Willie Studer Revox B77 with 456 Ampex than any tech I knew.)
>
> The **absolute best** analog, two track, mastering tape deck ever made,
> bar
> none!


Fabulous machine indeed, but Stephan Kudelski would like a word with
you.<G>

I have used it often and only sold my B77 when I had an absolute steal
on a Nagra (IV-S).
The limit of 7" reels didn't hinder what I wanted it for and I liked
its ability to record off batteries and that
it could take my B&K 4133 mics straight in. A movie studio made an
offer I couldn't refuse some 10 years later, and I had moved on to PCM
at that point.
I have always regretted that. http://tinyurl.com/6ye5af
I got a little teary just now..

>
> But you've have to bake the Ampex 456 to run it past the heads after this
> many years ...


I have heard about that trick...and that it works. That's cool.
I crashed a hard drive once, and recovered everything on it after
freezing it first.


Still have my B77, but don't get much use out of it these days.
Extremely nice machine.
Kerry

RC

Robatoy

in reply to "Lew Hodgett" on 12/11/2008 8:54 AM

12/11/2008 10:37 AM

On Nov 12, 12:50=A0pm, "Swingman" <[email protected]> wrote:
> "Robatoy" wrote
>
> > (And Swing would appreciate this, he could squeeze more bandwidth out o=
f
> > a Willie Studer Revox B77 with 456 Ampex than any tech I knew.)
>
> The **absolute best** analog, two track, mastering tape deck ever made, b=
ar
> none!


Fabulous machine indeed, but Stephan Kudelski would like a word with
you.<G>

I have used it often and only sold my B77 when I had an absolute steal
on a Nagra (IV-S).
The limit of 7" reels didn't hinder what I wanted it for and I liked
its ability to record off batteries and that
it could take my B&K 4133 mics straight in. A movie studio made an
offer I couldn't refuse some 10 years later, and I had moved on to PCM
at that point.
I have always regretted that. http://tinyurl.com/6ye5af
I got a little teary just now..

>
> But you've have to bake the Ampex 456 to run it past the heads after this
> many years ...


I have heard about that trick...and that it works. That's cool.
I crashed a hard drive once, and recovered everything on it after
freezing it first.

Rc

Robatoy

in reply to "Lew Hodgett" on 12/11/2008 8:54 AM

12/11/2008 12:22 PM

In article <[email protected]>,
"Swingman" <[email protected]> wrote:

> "Lew Hodgett" wrote
>
> > This is why women should not take men shopping against their will.
>
> SWMBO laughed at all but #3 ... go figure.

I thought # 3 was downright rude...and I'm not the squeamish type. Just
not funny.

What is funny, and needs to be on the list, is what a friend of mine
would do, if his wife was taking too long. He would go to the pharmacy
and ask for skin-coloured Band-Aids. (He's from Jamaica and considered
'dark' by other Jamaicans.) He would always think that was the funniest
thing evar! And when he cracked up, he'd take all the people around him
with it...very addictive laughter.

(And Swing would appreciate this, he could squeeze more bandwidth out of
a Willie Studer Revox B77 with 456 Ampex than any tech I knew.)

RC

Robatoy

in reply to "Lew Hodgett" on 12/11/2008 8:54 AM

12/11/2008 12:07 PM

On Nov 12, 3:00=A0pm, "Kerry Montgomery" <[email protected]> wrote:

>
> Still have my B77, but don't get much use out of it these days.
> Extremely nice machine.
> Kerry

They still look cool-as-all-get-out in the rumpus room on anybody's
equipment shelf.
Those big fat NAB hubs were the forerunners of today's 20" wheels...<G>

Sk

"Swingman"

in reply to "Lew Hodgett" on 12/11/2008 8:54 AM

12/11/2008 11:50 AM



"Robatoy" wrote

> (And Swing would appreciate this, he could squeeze more bandwidth out of
> a Willie Studer Revox B77 with 456 Ampex than any tech I knew.)

The **absolute best** analog, two track, mastering tape deck ever made, bar
none!

But you've have to bake the Ampex 456 to run it past the heads after this
many years ...

--
www.e-woodshop.net
Last update: 10/22/08
KarlC@ (the obvious)


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