Found this elsewhere, which made me laugh.
I'm sure someone will pop up and say it's years old ;-)
--------------------
Yesterday I was buying a large bag of Purina dog food for the puppies,
Benji and Smokey, at ASDA and was queuing at the check out. A woman behind
me asked if I had a dog. On impulse, I told her no, I didn't have a dog,
and that I was starting the Purina Diet again. Although I probably
shouldn't, because I'd ended up in the hospital last time, but that I'd
lost 5 stone before I awakened in an intensive care ward with tubes coming
out of most of my orifices and IVs in both arms.
I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and that the way that it
works is to load your trouser pockets with Purina biscuits and simply eat
one or two every time you feel hungry and that the food is nutritionally
complete so I was going to try it again. (I have to mention here that
practically everyone in the line was by now enthralled with my story.)
Horrified, she asked if I ended up in intensive care because the dog food
poisoned me. I told her no; I stepped off a curb to sniff an Irish
Setter's bum and a car hit us both.
I thought the guy behind her was going to have a heart attack, he was
laughing so hard!
ASDA won't let me shop there anymore!!!
--
Stuart Winsor
Don't miss the Risc OS Christmas show
http://rickman.orpheusweb.co.uk/mug/show08/MUGshow.html
On Dec 5, 6:35=A0pm, Stuart <[email protected]> wrote:
> Found this elsewhere, which made me laugh.
>
> I'm sure someone will pop up and say it's years old ;-)
>
It's years old!!!l
"Stuart" <[email protected]> wrote in message
news:[email protected]...
>
> Found this elsewhere, which made me laugh.
>
> I'm sure someone will pop up and say it's years old ;-)
>
> --------------------
>
> Yesterday I was buying a large bag of Purina dog food for the puppies,
> Benji and Smokey, at ASDA and was queuing at the check out. A woman behind
> me asked if I had a dog. On impulse, I told her no, I didn't have a dog,
> and that I was starting the Purina Diet again. Although I probably
> shouldn't, because I'd ended up in the hospital last time, but that I'd
> lost 5 stone before I awakened in an intensive care ward with tubes coming
> out of most of my orifices and IVs in both arms.
>
> I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and that the way that it
> works is to load your trouser pockets with Purina biscuits and simply eat
> one or two every time you feel hungry and that the food is nutritionally
> complete so I was going to try it again. (I have to mention here that
> practically everyone in the line was by now enthralled with my story.)
>
> Horrified, she asked if I ended up in intensive care because the dog food
> poisoned me. I told her no; I stepped off a curb to sniff an Irish
> Setter's bum and a car hit us both.
Right after you pissed on the fire hydrant?
--
www.e-woodshop.net
Last update: 10/22/08
KarlC@ (the obvious)
On Fri, 05 Dec 2008 23:35:10 +0000 (GMT), Stuart <[email protected]> wrote:
An oldie but goodie...
Came through years ago with the punch line being something like "I was out in
the street licking my balls and a car hit me"
>
>Found this elsewhere, which made me laugh.
>
>I'm sure someone will pop up and say it's years old ;-)
>
>--------------------
>
>Yesterday I was buying a large bag of Purina dog food for the puppies,
>Benji and Smokey,
mac
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