Here's one folk tale. Anyone know others?
Bob
In the 16th and 17th centuries, everything had to be transported by ship
and it was also before commercial fertilizer's invention, so large
shipments of manure were common. It was shipped dry, because in dry
form it weighed a\ lot less than when wet, but once water (at sea) hit
it, it not only became heavier, but the process of fermentation began
again, of which a by product is methane gas. As the stuff was stored
below decks in bundles you can see what could (and did) happen. Methane
began to build up below decks and the first time someone came below at
night with a lantern, BOOOOM!
Several ships were destroyed in this manner before it was determined
just what was happening. After that, the bundles of manure were always
stamped with the term "Ship High In Transit" on them, which meant for
the sailors to stow it high enough off the lower decks so that any water
that came into the hold would not touch this volatile cargo and start
the production of methane.
Thus evolved the term "S.H.I.T " , (Ship High In Transport) which has
come down through the centuries and is in use to this very day.
On Mon, 25 Jul 2005 13:19:21 GMT, Bob Schmall <[email protected]>
wrote:
>Here's one folk tale. Anyone know others?
>
>Bob
>
>In the 16th and 17th centuries, everything had to be transported by ship
>and it was also before commercial fertilizer's invention, so large
>shipments of manure were common. It was shipped dry, because in dry
>form it weighed a\ lot less than when wet, but once water (at sea) hit
>it, it not only became heavier, but the process of fermentation began
>again, of which a by product is methane gas. As the stuff was stored
>below decks in bundles you can see what could (and did) happen. Methane
>began to build up below decks and the first time someone came below at
>night with a lantern, BOOOOM!
>
>Several ships were destroyed in this manner before it was determined
>just what was happening. After that, the bundles of manure were always
>stamped with the term "Ship High In Transit" on them, which meant for
>the sailors to stow it high enough off the lower decks so that any water
>that came into the hold would not touch this volatile cargo and start
>the production of methane.
>
>Thus evolved the term "S.H.I.T " , (Ship High In Transport) which has
>come down through the centuries and is in use to this very day.
THE PLAN
In the beginning was The Plan.
And then came the Assumptions.
And the Assumptions were without form.
And The Plan was without substance.
And darkness was upon the face of the Workers. And they spoke among
themselves, saying, "It is a crock of shit and it stinketh."
And the Workers went into their Supervisors and said,
"It is a pail of dung and none may abide the odor thereof."
And the Supervisors went unto their Managers, saying, "It is a
container of excrement and it is very strong, such that none may abide
by it."
And the Managers went unto their Directors, saying, "It is a vessel of
fertilizer and none may abide its strength."
And the Directors spoke amongst themselves, saying one to another, "It
contains that which aids plant growth and it is very strong."
And the Directors went unto the Vice Presidents, saying, "It promotes
growth and it is very powerful."
And the Vice Presidents went unto the President, saying, "This new
Plan will actively promote the growth and vigor of the company with
powerful effects."
And the President looked upon The Plan and saw that it was good. And
The Plan became Policy.
And that is how Shit Happens.
http://www.exit109.com/~gosta/stuffhap.sht
On Mon, 25 Jul 2005 15:49:20 GMT, Bob Schmall <[email protected]>
wrote:
>Tom Watson wrote:
>> THE PLAN
>
>...is good, and copyrighted as well. I always knew Watson was a
>wordsmith and not a lawyer.
>
>Bob, admiring T.W.
It is?
I got it from a website and used the URL as a means of attribution.
Ya mean that the black helicopters is still gonna come get me?
Shazzam!
Tom Watson wrote:
> On Mon, 25 Jul 2005 13:19:21 GMT, Bob Schmall <[email protected]>
> wrote:
>
>
>>Here's one folk tale. Anyone know others?
>>
>>Bob
>>
>>In the 16th and 17th centuries, everything had to be transported by ship
>>and it was also before commercial fertilizer's invention, so large
(snip)
>>Thus evolved the term "S.H.I.T " , (Ship High In Transport) which has
>>come down through the centuries and is in use to this very day.
>
>
> THE PLAN
...is good, and copyrighted as well. I always knew Watson was a
wordsmith and not a lawyer.
Bob, admiring T.W.
Bob Schmall wrote:
> Here's one folk tale. Anyone know others?
>
> Bob
>
> In the 16th and 17th centuries, everything had to be transported by ship
> and it was also before commercial fertilizer's invention, so large
> shipments of manure were common. It was shipped dry, because in dry
> form it weighed a\ lot less than when wet, but once water (at sea) hit
> it, it not only became heavier, but the process of fermentation began
> again, of which a by product is methane gas. As the stuff was stored
> below decks in bundles you can see what could (and did) happen. Methane
> began to build up below decks and the first time someone came below at
> night with a lantern, BOOOOM!
>
> Several ships were destroyed in this manner before it was determined
> just what was happening. After that, the bundles of manure were always
> stamped with the term "Ship High In Transit" on them, which meant for
> the sailors to stow it high enough off the lower decks so that any water
> that came into the hold would not touch this volatile cargo and start
> the production of methane.
>
> Thus evolved the term "S.H.I.T " , (Ship High In Transport) which has
> come down through the centuries and is in use to this very day.
G'day all,
This was a yarn I heard many years ago. I think I got it in the dark old
days when faxing jokes and comics was popular.
I can't find my copy, so a search of net showed up this. I don't think
it's quite the same as the one I had, but the point id there ;)
All the best
John
Do You Know "Jack Shitt"?
Who is Jack Schitt?
For some time many of us have wondered just who is Jack Schitt? We find
ourselves at a loss when someone says, "You don't know Jack Schitt!"
Well, thanks to my genealogy efforts, you can now respond in an
intellectual way.
Jack Schitt is the only son of Awe Schitt. Awe Schitt, the fertilizer
magnate, married O. Schitt, the owner of Needeep N. Schitt, Inc. They
had one son, Jack.
In turn, Jack Schitt married Noe Schitt. The deeply religious couple
produced six children: Holie Schitt, Giva Schitt, Fulla Schitt, Bull
Schitt, and the twins Deap Schitt and Dip Schitt.
Against her parent's objections, Deap Schitt married Dumb Schitt, a high
school dropout.
After being married 15 years, Jack and Noe Schitt divorced. Noe Schitt
later married Ted Sherlock, and, because her kids were living with them,
she wanted to keep her previous name. She was then known as Noe Schitt
Sherlock.
Meanwhile, Dip Schitt married Loda Schitt, and they produced a son with
a rather nervous disposition named Chicken Schitt. Two of the other six
children, Fulla Schitt and Giva Schitt, were inseparable throughout
childhood and subsequently married the Happens brothers in a dual
ceremony. The wedding announcement in the newspaper announced the
Schitt-Happens nuptials. The Schitt-Happens children were Dawg, Byrd,
and Hoarse. Bull Schitt, the prodigal son, left home to tour the world.
He recently returned from Italy with his new Italian bride, Pisa Schitt.
Now when someone says, "You don't know Jack Schitt," you can correct them.
Bob Schmall wrote:
> Here's one folk tale. Anyone know others?
>
> Bob
>
> In the 16th and 17th centuries, everything had to be transported by ship
> and it was also before commercial fertilizer's invention, so large
> shipments of manure were common. It was shipped dry, because in dry
> form it weighed a\ lot less than when wet, but once water (at sea) hit
> it, it not only became heavier, but the process of fermentation began
> again, of which a by product is methane gas. As the stuff was stored
> below decks in bundles you can see what could (and did) happen. Methane
> began to build up below decks and the first time someone came below at
> night with a lantern, BOOOOM!
>
> Several ships were destroyed in this manner before it was determined
> just what was happening. After that, the bundles of manure were always
> stamped with the term "Ship High In Transit" on them, which meant for
> the sailors to stow it high enough off the lower decks so that any water
> that came into the hold would not touch this volatile cargo and start
> the production of methane.
>
> Thus evolved the term "S.H.I.T " , (Ship High In Transport) which has
> come down through the centuries and is in use to this very day.
MEMORANDUM TO ALL ACC PERSONNEL
FROM: ACC Quality
SUBJECT: Special High Intensity Training
1. In order to assure that we continue to promote the highest quality
Air Force possible, ACC has created a new Quality Air Force training
program, replacing the current Awarness, Team Member, and Leader classes
with a new program of Special High Intensity Training (S.H.I.T.).
2. ACC's goal it to give our personnel more S.H.I.T. than any other
command in the Air Force.
3. If you feel that you do not receive your share of S.H.I.T. on the
job, please see your Squadron Quality Advisor. You will be placed on
the top of the S.H.I.T. list for special attention.
4. All of our Quality Advisors are particularly qualified to see that
you get all the S.H.I.T. you can handle at your own speed.
5. If you consider yourself to be trained enough already, you may be
interested in helping train others. We can add your name to our Basic
Understanding Lecture List, Special High Intensity Training
(B.U.L.L.S.H.I.T.) program.
6. If you have further questions, please address them to our Head Of
Training, Special High Intensity Training (H.O.T.S.H.I.T.) department.
Boss In General
Special High Intensity Training
(B.I.G.S.H.I.T.)
P.S. With the personality some of you display around here, you could
easily become the Director Intensity Program, Special High Intensity
Training
--
Bill Berglin
http://home.comcast.net/~bberg100
"Life should not be a journey to the grave with the intention of
arriving safely in a pretty and well preserved body, but rather to skid
in broadside, thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and loudly
proclaiming, 'WOW! What A RIDE!!" ... Unknown
On Mon, 25 Jul 2005 13:19:21 GMT, Bob Schmall <[email protected]>
wrote:
>Here's one folk tale. Anyone know others?
>
>Bob
>
>In the 16th and 17th centuries, everything had to be transported by ship
>and it was also before commercial fertilizer's invention, so large
>shipments of manure were common. It was shipped dry, because in dry
>form it weighed a\ lot less than when wet, but once water (at sea) hit
>it, it not only became heavier, but the process of fermentation began
>again, of which a by product is methane gas. As the stuff was stored
>below decks in bundles you can see what could (and did) happen. Methane
>began to build up below decks and the first time someone came below at
>night with a lantern, BOOOOM!
>
>Several ships were destroyed in this manner before it was determined
>just what was happening. After that, the bundles of manure were always
>stamped with the term "Ship High In Transit" on them, which meant for
>the sailors to stow it high enough off the lower decks so that any water
>that came into the hold would not touch this volatile cargo and start
>the production of methane.
>
>Thus evolved the term "S.H.I.T " , (Ship High In Transport) which has
>come down through the centuries and is in use to this very day.
Was listening to "A way with words" on NPR last Sunday, and they were
talking about this very thing- evidently, acryonyms were not common
usage until WWII, and there is generally a much more direct root.
IIRC, Chaucer used the word shitte in The Canterbury Tales (The
Miller's Tale, perhaps?), and that was long before the 16th or 17th
century.
In article <[email protected]>, Bob Schmall <[email protected]> wrote:
>Ray wrote:
>> I think somebody fed you a load of S.H.I.T.
>>
>> http://www.snopes.com/language/acronyms/shit.asp
>>
>
>I figured we'd get to the bottom of it. Thanks for the information, Ray.
>It makes more sense your way.
>BTW, what's the origin of f---?
Same as s*** -- German, via Old/Middle English. "Poop", however comes from
Dutch.
--
Regards,
Doug Miller (alphageek at milmac dot com)
It's time to throw all their damned tea in the harbor again.