The Difference Between Heaven and Hell
February 10, 2008
A holy man was having a conversation with the Lord one day and said,
'Lord, I would like to know what Heaven and Hell are like.'
The Lord led the holy man to two doors.
He opened one of the doors and the holy man looked in. In the middle
of the room was a large round table. In the middle of the table was a
large pot of stew, which smelled delicious and made the holy man's
mouth water.
The people sitting around the table were thin and sickly. They
appeared to be famished. They were holding spoons with very long
handles that were strapped to their arms and each found it possible to
reach into the pot of stew and take a spoonful. But because the handle
was longer than their arms, they could not get the spoons back into
their mouths.
The holy man shuddered at the sight of their misery and suffering.
The Lord said, 'You have seen Hell.'
They went to the next room and opened the door. It was exactly the
same as the first one. There was the large round table with the large
pot of stew which made the holy man's mouth water. The people were
equipped with the same long-handled spoons, but here the people were
well nourished and plump, laughing and talking.
The holy man said, 'I don't understand.'
'It is simple,' said the Lord. 'It requires but one skill. You see
they have learned to feed each other, while the greedy think only of
themselves.'
On Tue, 12 Feb 2008 15:39:32 -0800 (PST), Robatoy <[email protected]>
wrote:
>On Feb 12, 6:24 pm, "tom" <[email protected]> wrote:
>> "Dave in Houston" <[email protected]> wrote in messagenews:[email protected]...
>>
>> > "Micky" <[email protected]> wrote in message
>> >news:[email protected]...
>>
>> > > Either place seems good. No Americans <G>
>>
>> > Ooooh, ooooh, OUCH, OUCH! Oh, Death where is thy sting?!
>>
>> > Dave in Houston
>>
>> god bless america...no one else will.
>
>I just get all warm inside when I see Bush, and even Hillary, say it
>on TV.
>
>Btw, how's retroactive telecom immunity making you feel?
Sort of like the post birth abortion that I used to threaten my kids with..
mac
Please remove splinters before emailing
On Feb 12, 6:24=A0pm, "tom" <[email protected]> wrote:
> "Dave in Houston" <[email protected]> wrote in messagenews:FLpsj.1086=
[email protected]...
>
> > "Micky" <[email protected]> wrote in message
> >news:[email protected]...
>
> > > Either place seems good. No Americans <G>
>
> > Ooooh, ooooh, OUCH, OUCH! =A0Oh, Death where is thy sting?!
>
> > Dave in Houston
>
> god bless america...no one else will.
I just get all warm inside when I see Bush, and even Hillary, say it
on TV.
Btw, how's retroactive telecom immunity making you feel?
"Tom Watson" wrote:
> Heaven versus Hell
>
>
> In Heaven:
> The police are British
> The cooks are French
> The engineers are German
> The administrators are Swiss
> The lovers are Italian
>
>
> In Hell:
> The police are German
> The cooks are British
> The engineers are Italian
> The administrators are French
> The lovers are Swiss
Another oldie but goodie.
Having worked with several European suppliers, I can relate<grin>
Lew
"Dave in Houston" <[email protected]> wrote in message
news:[email protected]...
>
> "Micky" <[email protected]> wrote in message
> news:[email protected]...
>
> > Either place seems good. No Americans <G>
>
>
> Ooooh, ooooh, OUCH, OUCH! Oh, Death where is thy sting?!
>
> Dave in Houston
>
god bless america...no one else will.
Tom Watson wrote:
> On Tue, 12 Feb 2008 22:46:53 GMT, "Micky" <[email protected]>
> wrote:
>
>> "Lew Hodgett" <[email protected]> wrote in message
>> news:[email protected]...
>>> "Tom Watson" wrote:
>>>[snip] >>>
>> Either place seems good. No Americans <G>
>>
>
>
> So, where are you from, dickhead?
>
>
>
> Regards,
>
> Tom Watson
>
two words one following the other dickhead and regards. Sweet.
spasm,
jo4hn
:-)
On Feb 14, 2:34=A0pm, "Micky" <[email protected]> wrote:
> "Tom Watson" <[email protected]> wrote in message
>
> news:[email protected]...
>
>
>
> > On Tue, 12 Feb 2008 22:46:53 GMT, "Micky" <[email protected]>
> > wrote:
>
> >>"Lew Hodgett" <[email protected]> wrote in message
> >>news:[email protected]...
>
> >>> "Tom Watson" wrote:
>
> >>>> Heaven versus Hell
>
> >>>> In Heaven:
> >>>> The police are British
> >>>> The cooks are French
> >>>> The engineers are German
> >>>> The administrators are Swiss
> >>>> The lovers are Italian
>
> >>>> In Hell:
> >>>> The police are German
> >>>> The cooks are British
> >>>> The engineers are Italian
> >>>> The administrators are French
> >>>> The lovers are Swiss
>
> >>> Another oldie but goodie.
>
> >>Either place seems good. No Americans <G>
>
> > So, where are you from, dickhead?
>
> > Regards,
>
> > Tom Watson
>
> > tjwatson1ATcomcastDOTnet (real email)
>
> >http://home.comcast.net/~tjwatson1/
>
> Isn't it strange that the people who tell jokes about other countries are
> always the
> first to object when they get ribbed about they're own country.
>
> Sigh
>
> Micky
=2E...." have you heard the joke about the American......?
"HEY... I AM an American..."
=2E.."ohhhkay, in that case I'll tell it slowly...."
On Tue, 12 Feb 2008 22:46:53 GMT, "Micky" <[email protected]>
wrote:
>
>"Lew Hodgett" <[email protected]> wrote in message
>news:[email protected]...
>>
>> "Tom Watson" wrote:
>>
>>> Heaven versus Hell
>>>
>>>
>>> In Heaven:
>>> The police are British
>>> The cooks are French
>>> The engineers are German
>>> The administrators are Swiss
>>> The lovers are Italian
>>>
>>>
>>> In Hell:
>>> The police are German
>>> The cooks are British
>>> The engineers are Italian
>>> The administrators are French
>>> The lovers are Swiss
>>
>> Another oldie but goodie.
>>
>Either place seems good. No Americans <G>
>
So, where are you from, dickhead?
Regards,
Tom Watson
tjwatson1ATcomcastDOTnet (real email)
http://home.comcast.net/~tjwatson1/
On Feb 10, 5:21=A0pm, "Lew Hodgett" <[email protected]> wrote:
> "Robatoy" wrote:
> > The Difference Between Heaven and Hell
>
> <snip>
>
> An oldie but goodie.
>
> Point well taken.
>
> Lew
I'm not that old,
g,d&r
"Tom Watson" <[email protected]> wrote in message
news:[email protected]...
> On Tue, 12 Feb 2008 22:46:53 GMT, "Micky" <[email protected]>
> wrote:
>
>>
>>"Lew Hodgett" <[email protected]> wrote in message
>>news:[email protected]...
>>>
>>> "Tom Watson" wrote:
>>>
>>>> Heaven versus Hell
>>>>
>>>>
>>>> In Heaven:
>>>> The police are British
>>>> The cooks are French
>>>> The engineers are German
>>>> The administrators are Swiss
>>>> The lovers are Italian
>>>>
>>>>
>>>> In Hell:
>>>> The police are German
>>>> The cooks are British
>>>> The engineers are Italian
>>>> The administrators are French
>>>> The lovers are Swiss
>>>
>>> Another oldie but goodie.
>>>
>>Either place seems good. No Americans <G>
>>
>
>
> So, where are you from, dickhead?
>
>
>
> Regards,
>
> Tom Watson
>
> tjwatson1ATcomcastDOTnet (real email)
>
> http://home.comcast.net/~tjwatson1/
Isn't it strange that the people who tell jokes about other countries are
always the
first to object when they get ribbed about they're own country.
Sigh
Micky
"Micky" <[email protected]> wrote in message
news:[email protected]...
> Either place seems good. No Americans <G>
Ooooh, ooooh, OUCH, OUCH! Oh, Death where is thy sting?!
Dave in Houston
On Feb 10, 5:43=A0pm, Tom Watson <[email protected]> wrote:
> In Hell:
> The lovers are Swiss
>
Oh my...
http://gingersnaps.files.wordpress.com/2007/10/the-swiss-misses.jpg
I can see how you'd be right.
On Sun, 10 Feb 2008 14:28:18 -0800 (PST), Robatoy
<[email protected]> wrote:
>On Feb 10, 5:21 pm, "Lew Hodgett" <[email protected]> wrote:
>> "Robatoy" wrote:
>> > The Difference Between Heaven and Hell
>>
>> <snip>
>>
>> An oldie but goodie.
>>
>> Point well taken.
>>
>> Lew
>
>I'm not that old,
>
>g,d&r
Heaven versus Hell
In Heaven:
The police are British
The cooks are French
The engineers are German
The administrators are Swiss
The lovers are Italian
In Hell:
The police are German
The cooks are British
The engineers are Italian
The administrators are French
The lovers are Swiss
Regards,
Tom Watson
tjwatson1ATcomcastDOTnet (real email)
http://home.comcast.net/~tjwatson1/
"Lew Hodgett" <[email protected]> wrote in message
news:[email protected]...
>
> "Tom Watson" wrote:
>
>> Heaven versus Hell
>>
>>
>> In Heaven:
>> The police are British
>> The cooks are French
>> The engineers are German
>> The administrators are Swiss
>> The lovers are Italian
>>
>>
>> In Hell:
>> The police are German
>> The cooks are British
>> The engineers are Italian
>> The administrators are French
>> The lovers are Swiss
>
> Another oldie but goodie.
>
Either place seems good. No Americans <G>