What follows is what, perhaps, happens when lawyers write
greeting cards...
From me, ("the wishor")
To you ("hereinafter called the wishee")
and those you care about ("hereinafter called the washees")
Please accept without obligation, implied or implicit, my best wishes
for an environmentally conscious, socially responsible, politically
correct, low stress, non- addictive, gender neutral, celebration of
the
winter solstice holiday, practiced within the most enjoyable
traditions
of the religious persuasion of your choice, or secular practices of
your
choice, with respect for the religious/secular persuasions and/or
traditions of others, or their choice not to practice religious or
secular traditions at all; and a financially successful, personally
fulfilling and medically uncomplicated recognition of the onset of the
generally accepted calendar year 2005, but with due respect for the
calendars of choice of other cultures or sects, and having regard to
the
race, creed, color, age, physical ability, religious faith, choice of
computer platform or dietary preference of the wishee. By accepting
this
greeting you are bound by these terms that
* This greeting is subject to further clarification or withdrawal.
* This greeting is freely transferable provided that no alteration
shall
be made to the original greeting and that the proprietary rights of
the
wishor are acknowledged.
* This greeting implies no promise by the wishor to actually implement
any of the wishes.
* This greeting may not be enforceable in certain jurisdictions and/or
the restrictions herein may not be binding upon certain wishees in
certain jurisdictions and is revocable at the sole discretion of the
wishor.
* This greeting is warranted to perform as reasonably may be expected
within the usual application of good tidings, for a period of one year
or until the issuance of a subsequent holiday greeting, whichever
comes
first.
* The wishor warrants this greeting only for the limited replacement
of
this wish or issuance of a new wish at the sole discretion of the
wishor.
* Any references in this greeting to "the Lord", "Father Christmas",
"Our Savior", or any other festive figures, whether actual or
fictitious, dead or alive, shall not imply any endorsement by or from
them in respect of this greeting, and all proprietary rights in any
referenced third party names and images are hereby acknowledged.
* This greeting may have been offered at a lower price by the wishor
within the last 30 days. This greeting does not affect your statutory
rights.
Stolen from the net