A man walked into the produce section of his local supermarket,
and asked to buy half a head of lettuce. The boy working in that
department told him that they only sold whole heads of lettuce.
The man was insistent that the boy ask his manager about the
matter.
Walking into the back room, the boy said to the manager, "Some
asshole wants to buy half a head of lettuce." As he finished his
sentence, he turned to find the man standing right behind him,
so he added, "And this gentleman kindly offered to buy the
other half."
The manager approved the deal, and the man went on his way.
Later the manager said to the boy, "I was impressed with the
way you got yourself out of that situation earlier. We
like people who think on their feet here.
"Where are you from, son?"
"Texas, sir," the boy replied.
"Well, why did you leave Texas?" the manager asked.
The boy said, "Sir, there's nothing down there but
whores and football players ."
"Really!" said the manager. "My wife is from Texas."
"No shit??" replied the boy. "Who'd she play for?"