Hh

"HeyBub"

28/09/2011 3:24 PM

Wood theft

A Chinese woodworker recently opened his shop to discover that sometime
during the night a significant quantity of his rare wood blanks had been
stolen.

Looking for clues, he discovered a child's footprints in the floor's
sawdust. The woodcarver decided to lie in wait to capture the thief.

Sure enough, that night he heard a noise. The Chinese woodwork jumped from
his hiding place and flicked on the light.

Standing before him was a SEVEN-FOOT tall BEAR with itty-bitty feet!!!

Thinking quickly, the craftsman hollered: "Ah ha, I've caught you, boy-foot
bear with Teaks of Chan!!"


This topic has 19 replies

Cc

"CW"

in reply to "HeyBub" on 28/09/2011 3:24 PM

01/10/2011 4:48 PM



"DanG" wrote in message news:[email protected]...

On 9/30/2011 5:27 PM, CW wrote:
>
>
> "SonomaProducts.com" wrote in message
> news:[email protected]...
>
>> Thinking quickly, the craftsman hollered: "Ah ha, I've caught you,
>> boy-foot
>> bear with Teaks of Chan!!"
>
> I guess I am dense. Can someone explain the reference. I am not
> getting it. Something about a bare foot boy I presume.
> =======================================================
>
> You're not alone.


That is really too bad for you and Ed. As I reach my twilight years, it
was certainly worth a re- read. It revels in the riches of youth; a
barefoot boy who is prince, seer, and learned sachem. Yeah, the lord
and master of his domain.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

After finding out what it was, I'm glad I missed it.

GS

Gordon Shumway

in reply to "HeyBub" on 28/09/2011 3:24 PM

29/09/2011 10:51 AM

On Wed, 28 Sep 2011 15:24:57 -0500, "HeyBub" <[email protected]>
wrote:

>A Chinese woodworker recently opened his shop to discover that sometime
>during the night a significant quantity of his rare wood blanks had been
>stolen.
>
>Looking for clues, he discovered a child's footprints in the floor's
>sawdust. The woodcarver decided to lie in wait to capture the thief.
>
>Sure enough, that night he heard a noise. The Chinese woodwork jumped from
>his hiding place and flicked on the light.
>
>Standing before him was a SEVEN-FOOT tall BEAR with itty-bitty feet!!!
>
>Thinking quickly, the craftsman hollered: "Ah ha, I've caught you, boy-foot
>bear with Teaks of Chan!!"
>

Groan...

JW

Just Wondering

in reply to "HeyBub" on 28/09/2011 3:24 PM

30/09/2011 5:37 PM

On 9/30/2011 4:27 PM, CW wrote:
>
>
> "SonomaProducts.com" wrote in message
> news:[email protected]...
>
>> Thinking quickly, the craftsman hollered: "Ah ha, I've caught you,
>> boy-foot
>> bear with Teaks of Chan!!"
>
> I guess I am dense. Can someone explain the reference. I am not
> getting it. Something about a bare foot boy I presume.
> =======================================================
>
> You're not alone.

It's a pun on the poem "The Barefoot Boy" by John Whittier, which starts
out,

"Blessings on thee, little man,
Barefoot boy, with cheek of tan!"

The whole poem's pretty long, you can read it at
http://www.poetryfoundation.org/poem/174752

Sb

"SonomaProducts.com"

in reply to "HeyBub" on 28/09/2011 3:24 PM

03/10/2011 10:43 AM


> English Lit I, Whittier
>
> Blessings on thee, little man,
> Barefoot boy, with cheek of tan!
>
> With thy turned-up pantaloons,
> And thy merry whistled tunes;
> ...
> etc., etc., ...
>
> --

Well... once again admitting my ignorance has added to my knowledge.
Sounds like a cute poem. Majoring in enginnering it was a badge of
honor to never (legitimately) pass an English course (includin'
spellin'). Thank god for girlfriends. Became a bit more difficult when
I went back for a degree in marketing.

pp

in reply to "HeyBub" on 28/09/2011 3:24 PM

02/10/2011 6:52 PM

On Sep 28, 10:24=A0am, "HeyBub" <[email protected]> wrote:
> A Chinese woodworker recently opened his shop to discover that sometime
> during the night a significant quantity of his rare wood blanks had been
> stolen.
>
> Looking for clues, he discovered a child's footprints in the floor's
> sawdust. The woodcarver decided to lie in wait to capture the thief.
>
> Sure enough, that night he heard a noise. The Chinese woodwork jumped fro=
m
> his hiding place and flicked on the light.
>
> Standing before him was a SEVEN-FOOT tall BEAR with itty-bitty feet!!!
>
> Thinking quickly, the craftsman hollered: "Ah ha, I've caught you, boy-fo=
ot
> bear with Teaks of Chan!!"

YOU ARE IN THE WRONG GROUP !!

ZY

Zz Yzx

in reply to "HeyBub" on 28/09/2011 3:24 PM

30/09/2011 5:03 PM

>Blessings on thee, little man,
>Barefoot boy, with cheek of tan!

"If the foo shits, wear it"
(circa ~1965)

-Zz

Sb

"SonomaProducts.com"

in reply to "HeyBub" on 28/09/2011 3:24 PM

30/09/2011 10:30 AM

> Thinking quickly, the craftsman hollered: "Ah ha, I've caught you, boy-foot
> bear with Teaks of Chan!!"

I guess I am dense. Can someone explain the reference. I am not
getting it. Something about a bare foot boy I presume.

Hh

"HeyBub"

in reply to "HeyBub" on 28/09/2011 3:24 PM

01/10/2011 8:30 AM

SonomaProducts.com wrote:
>> Thinking quickly, the craftsman hollered: "Ah ha, I've caught you,
>> boy-foot bear with Teaks of Chan!!"
>
> I guess I am dense. Can someone explain the reference. I am not
> getting it. Something about a bare foot boy I presume.

Ah, the curse of a liberal education. Recently a conservative penned a
novel, The Overton Window. The jacket blurb had this incantation:

"As it will be in the future, it was at the birth of Man
There are only four things certain since Social Progress began.
That the Dog returns to his Vomit and the Sow returns to her Mire,
And the burnt Fool's bandaged finger goes wabbling back to the Fire;

"And that after this is accomplished, and the brave new world begins
When all men are paid for existing and no man must pay for his sins,
As surely as Water will wet us, as surely as Fire will burn,
The Gods of the Copybook Headings* with terror and slaughter return!"

Or you can view the trailer here:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wBoeHgy7svg

Without exception, a bevy of liberal bloggers and pundits screeched, hopped
up and down, and, with pointed fingers, exclaimed that this digestion was
evidence sufficient of a diseased and disgusting mind!

The blurb was not from the conservative author, but from a poem, The Gods of
the Copybook Headings, by Rudyard Kipling.

-------
* Copybook Headings. In English grammar schools, books were handed out with
pages mostly blank. These were "copybooks". Each page had at the top a pithy
saying, i.e., "A stitch in time saves nine," "A penny saved is a penny
earned," etc., written in a florid hand. It was the object of the exercise
for each student to copy the top-line quote, doing his best to match the
penmanship.


Cc

"CW"

in reply to "HeyBub" on 28/09/2011 3:24 PM

30/09/2011 3:27 PM



"SonomaProducts.com" wrote in message
news:[email protected]...

> Thinking quickly, the craftsman hollered: "Ah ha, I've caught you,
> boy-foot
> bear with Teaks of Chan!!"

I guess I am dense. Can someone explain the reference. I am not
getting it. Something about a bare foot boy I presume.
=======================================================

You're not alone.

DM

Doug Miller

in reply to "HeyBub" on 28/09/2011 3:24 PM

28/09/2011 11:11 PM

On 9/28/2011 4:24 PM, HeyBub wrote:
> A Chinese woodworker recently opened his shop to discover that sometime
> during the night a significant quantity of his rare wood blanks had been
> stolen.
>
> Looking for clues, he discovered a child's footprints in the floor's
> sawdust. The woodcarver decided to lie in wait to capture the thief.
>
> Sure enough, that night he heard a noise. The Chinese woodwork jumped from
> his hiding place and flicked on the light.
>
> Standing before him was a SEVEN-FOOT tall BEAR with itty-bitty feet!!!
>
> Thinking quickly, the craftsman hollered: "Ah ha, I've caught you, boy-foot
> bear with Teaks of Chan!!"
>
Don't quit your day job.

dn

dpb

in reply to "HeyBub" on 28/09/2011 3:24 PM

30/09/2011 1:09 PM

On 9/30/2011 12:30 PM, SonomaProducts.com wrote:
>> Thinking quickly, the craftsman hollered: "Ah ha, I've caught you, boy-foot
>> bear with Teaks of Chan!!"
>
> I guess I am dense. Can someone explain the reference. I am not
> getting it. Something about a bare foot boy I presume.

English Lit I, Whittier

Blessings on thee, little man,
Barefoot boy, with cheek of tan!

With thy turned-up pantaloons,
And thy merry whistled tunes;
...
etc., etc., ...

--

dn

dpb

in reply to "HeyBub" on 28/09/2011 3:24 PM

30/09/2011 1:18 PM

On 9/30/2011 1:09 PM, dpb wrote:
> On 9/30/2011 12:30 PM, SonomaProducts.com wrote:
>>> Thinking quickly, the craftsman hollered: "Ah ha, I've caught you,
>>> boy-foot
>>> bear with Teaks of Chan!!"
>>
>> I guess I am dense. Can someone explain the reference. I am not
>> getting it. Something about a bare foot boy I presume.
>
> English Lit I, Whittier
...

American english literature, that would be, not English ...

--

Dd

DanG

in reply to "HeyBub" on 28/09/2011 3:24 PM

01/10/2011 6:09 PM

On 9/30/2011 5:27 PM, CW wrote:
>
>
> "SonomaProducts.com" wrote in message
> news:[email protected]...
>
>> Thinking quickly, the craftsman hollered: "Ah ha, I've caught you,
>> boy-foot
>> bear with Teaks of Chan!!"
>
> I guess I am dense. Can someone explain the reference. I am not
> getting it. Something about a bare foot boy I presume.
> =======================================================
>
> You're not alone.


That is really too bad for you and Ed. As I reach my twilight years, it
was certainly worth a re- read. It revels in the riches of youth; a
barefoot boy who is prince, seer, and learned sachem. Yeah, the lord
and master of his domain.

Not a bad groaner for a woodworking group either, as groaners go.

Mj

"Morgans"

in reply to "HeyBub" on 28/09/2011 3:24 PM

01/10/2011 10:04 PM

>Blessings on thee, little man,
>Barefoot boy, with cheek of tan!

"If the foo shits, wear it"
(circa ~1965)
--------------------------------------------
One of my all time favorites!

-- Jim in NC

bR

[email protected] (Robert Bonomi)

in reply to "HeyBub" on 28/09/2011 3:24 PM

02/10/2011 2:09 AM

In article <[email protected]>,
Morgans <[email protected]> wrote:
>>Blessings on thee, little man,
>>Barefoot boy, with cheek of tan!

I seem to remember Mr. Peabody explaining the ursine wood-thief to
Sherman.

>
>"If the foo shits, wear it"
>(circa ~1965)
>--------------------------------------------
>One of my all time favorites!
>

"Abscess makes the fart go honda"

"Pardon me Roy, is that the cat who chewed your new shoes?"

"That's the beer that made Mel Famey walk us"

"the squaw of the hippopotamus....."

"Little girls aren't as gullible as they used to be.'


Does anyone else remember the Rary bird?

Or the brothers that couldn't couldn't agree on name for their cattle
ranch?

LJ

Larry Jaques

in reply to "HeyBub" on 28/09/2011 3:24 PM

02/10/2011 4:23 AM

On Sun, 02 Oct 2011 02:09:56 -0500, [email protected]
(Robert Bonomi) wrote:

>In article <[email protected]>,
>Morgans <[email protected]> wrote:
>>>Blessings on thee, little man,
>>>Barefoot boy, with cheek of tan!
>
>I seem to remember Mr. Peabody explaining the ursine wood-thief to
>Sherman.
>
>>
>>"If the foo shits, wear it"
>>(circa ~1965)
>>--------------------------------------------
>>One of my all time favorites!
>>
>
>"Abscess makes the fart go honda"
>
>"Pardon me Roy, is that the cat who chewed your new shoes?"
>
>"That's the beer that made Mel Famey walk us"
>
>"the squaw of the hippopotamus....."
>
>"Little girls aren't as gullible as they used to be.'
>
>
>Does anyone else remember the Rary bird?

It's a long way to tip a Rarey.


>Or the brothers that couldn't couldn't agree on name for their cattle
>ranch?

No, but I daren't ask...

--
It takes as much energy to wish as to plan.
--Eleanor Roosevelt

LJ

Larry Jaques

in reply to "HeyBub" on 28/09/2011 3:24 PM

02/10/2011 11:52 AM

On Sun, 02 Oct 2011 11:47:27 -0500, [email protected]
(Robert Bonomi) wrote:

>In article <[email protected]>,
>Larry Jaques <[email protected]> wrote:
>>On Sun, 02 Oct 2011 02:09:56 -0500, [email protected]
>>(Robert Bonomi) wrote:
>>
>>>In article <[email protected]>,
>>>Morgans <[email protected]> wrote:
>>>>>Blessings on thee, little man,
>>>>>Barefoot boy, with cheek of tan!
>>>
>>>I seem to remember Mr. Peabody explaining the ursine wood-thief to
>>>Sherman.
>>>
>>>>
>>>>"If the foo shits, wear it"
>>>>(circa ~1965)
>>>>--------------------------------------------
>>>>One of my all time favorites!
>>>>
>>>
>>>"Abscess makes the fart go honda"
>>>
>>>"Pardon me Roy, is that the cat who chewed your new shoes?"
>>>
>>>"That's the beer that made Mel Famey walk us"
>>>
>>>"the squaw of the hippopotamus....."
>>>
>>>"Little girls aren't as gullible as they used to be.'
>>>
>>>
>>>Does anyone else remember the Rary bird?
>>
>>It's a long way to tip a Rarey.
>
>And then he looks back over the lengthy distance it took the dump-truck
>to get from the residence to the cliff and adds:
>
>"It's a long way to home"
>
>>>Or the brothers that couldn't couldn't agree on name for their cattle
>>>ranch?
>>
>>No, but I daren't ask...
>>
>
>That won't save you. <grin>
>
>The brothers _finally_ agreed to abide by whatever their mother suggested.
>When consulted, she opined that there one name that was a *prefectly* fit
>for their ranch: "Focus".
>
>enlightenment follows..
>
> "That's where the sons raise meat."
>
>Purportedly the worlds only 'perfect' _triple_ pun.

I'd never heard that joke, so it was still wasted on me. Was this the
entire joke?

--snip--
Three brothers started a cattle ranch out west. They were very
successfull, but could not agree what to call their ranch. They
finally agreed to wire their father back east and abide by his
decision. He replied at once they should call it "focus". They did so,
but now argued endlessly about why he had given them that name. They
sent him another wire to ask why that name. He replied, "Simple,
because focus is where the sun's rays meet (son's raise meat)."
--snip--

--
Worry is a misuse of imagination.
-- Dan Zadra

bR

[email protected] (Robert Bonomi)

in reply to "HeyBub" on 28/09/2011 3:24 PM

02/10/2011 11:47 AM

In article <[email protected]>,
Larry Jaques <[email protected]> wrote:
>On Sun, 02 Oct 2011 02:09:56 -0500, [email protected]
>(Robert Bonomi) wrote:
>
>>In article <[email protected]>,
>>Morgans <[email protected]> wrote:
>>>>Blessings on thee, little man,
>>>>Barefoot boy, with cheek of tan!
>>
>>I seem to remember Mr. Peabody explaining the ursine wood-thief to
>>Sherman.
>>
>>>
>>>"If the foo shits, wear it"
>>>(circa ~1965)
>>>--------------------------------------------
>>>One of my all time favorites!
>>>
>>
>>"Abscess makes the fart go honda"
>>
>>"Pardon me Roy, is that the cat who chewed your new shoes?"
>>
>>"That's the beer that made Mel Famey walk us"
>>
>>"the squaw of the hippopotamus....."
>>
>>"Little girls aren't as gullible as they used to be.'
>>
>>
>>Does anyone else remember the Rary bird?
>
>It's a long way to tip a Rarey.

And then he looks back over the lengthy distance it took the dump-truck
to get from the residence to the cliff and adds:

"It's a long way to home"

>>Or the brothers that couldn't couldn't agree on name for their cattle
>>ranch?
>
>No, but I daren't ask...
>

That won't save you. <grin>

The brothers _finally_ agreed to abide by whatever their mother suggested.
When consulted, she opined that there one name that was a *prefectly* fit
for their ranch: "Focus".




enlightenment follows..





















"That's where the sons raise meat."


Purportedly the worlds only 'perfect' _triple_ pun.

EP

"Ed Pawlowski"

in reply to "HeyBub" on 28/09/2011 3:24 PM

30/09/2011 9:32 PM


"dpb" <[email protected]> wrote in message news:[email protected]...
> On 9/30/2011 12:30 PM, SonomaProducts.com wrote:
>>> Thinking quickly, the craftsman hollered: "Ah ha, I've caught you,
>>> boy-foot
>>> bear with Teaks of Chan!!"
>>
>> I guess I am dense. Can someone explain the reference. I am not
>> getting it. Something about a bare foot boy I presume.
>
> English Lit I, Whittier
>
> Blessings on thee, little man,
> Barefoot boy, with cheek of tan!
>
> With thy turned-up pantaloons,
> And thy merry whistled tunes;
> ...
> etc., etc., ...

I think I napped that class.


You’ve reached the end of replies