The Afghan Quarterback
The coach had put together the perfect team for the Detroit Lions. The
only thing that was missing was a good quarterback. He had scouted all the
colleges and even the Canadian and European Leagues, but he couldn't find a
ringer who could ensure a Super Bowl win.
Then one night while watching CNN he saw a war-zone scene in Afghanistan
... In one corner of the background, he spotted a young Afghan Muslim
soldier with a truly incredible arm. He threw a hand-grenade straight into
a 15th story window 100 yards away. KABOOM!
He threw another hand-grenade 75 yards away, right into a chimney.
KA-BLOOEY!
Then he threw another at a passing car going 90 mph. BULLS-EYE!
"I've got to get this guy!" coach said to himself. "He has the perfect
arm!" So, he brings him to the States and teaches him the great game of
football. And the Lions go on to win the Super Bowl. The young Afghan is
hailed as the great hero of football, and when the coach asks him what he
wants, all the young man wants is to call his mother.
"Mom," he says into the phone, "I just won the Super Bowl!"
"I don't want to talk to you," the old Muslim woman says. "You are not my
son!"
"I don't think you understand, Mother," the young man pleads. "I've won the
greatest sporting event in the world. I'm here among thousands of my
adoring fans."
"No! Let me tell you!" his mother retorts. "At this very moment, there are
gunshots all around us. The neighborhood is a pile of rubble. Your two
brothers were beaten within an inch of their lives last week, and I have to
keep your sister in the house so she doesn't get raped!" The old lady
pauses, and then tearfully says,
"I will never forgive you for making us move to Detroit!!"
--
-Mike-
[email protected]
On Jan 12, 8:16=A0pm, "Mike Marlow" <[email protected]>
wrote:
> Lew Hodgett wrote:
> > "Mike Marlow" wrote:
>
> > <snip>
> >> "I will never forgive you =A0for making us move to Detroit!!"
> > ----------------------------------
> > Speaking as someone who has spent a fair amount of time in Metro
> > Detroit, not only on business but on vacation, can only say, "Low
> > Blow"
>
> Vacation??? =A0Lew - nobody vacations in Detroit! =A0It's like vacationin=
g in
> Solvay...
But Windsor Ontario, just south of Detroit is int Canada's banana
belt.
Luigi
"Mike Marlow" wrote:
<snip>
> "I will never forgive you for making us move to Detroit!!"
----------------------------------
Speaking as someone who has spent a fair amount of time in Metro
Detroit, not only on business but on vacation, can only say, "Low
Blow"
BTW, there is a major settlement of Arab speaking folks in Dearborn,
or was the last time I was there.
Lew
"Mike Marlow" wrote:
> Vacation??? Lew - nobody vacations in Detroit! It's like
> vacationing in Solvay...
-------------------
Greenfield Village & the museum are worth a couple of days and Lake
StClair is a good overnighter on your way to the North Channel at the
top of Lake Huron.
Joe Muirs downtown is/was a great fish house.
Depends on what you are looking for.
Lew
I wrote:
>> Windsor is East of downtown Detroit or was last time I was there.
"Bill" wrote:
> Without looking at a map, I would say the tunnel (from Detroit) to
> Windsor goes SE and the bridge to Windsor goes East. So, I think
> everyone is right. It's been a while since I've been to Windsor. I
> might have heard you need a passport to go now, but I'm not
> positive.
-------------------------------------
Last time I sailed under the bridge, it was oriented East-West.
Lew
On 2011-01-12 16:04:00 -0500, "Lew Hodgett" <[email protected]> said:
> BTW, there is a major settlement of Arab speaking folks in Dearborn, or
> was the last time I was there.
Best place to a eat a fine Mediterranean meal: any of the four La Shish
restaurants.
On Thu, 13 Jan 2011 09:44:24 -0500, Bill <[email protected]> wrote:
>Lew Hodgett wrote:
>> "Luigi Zanasi" wrote:
>>
>>> But Windsor Ontario, just south of Detroit is int Canada's banana
>> belt.
>> ------------------------------
>> Remind me not to ask you to be navigator.<G>
>>
>> Windsor is East of downtown Detroit or was last time I was there.
>>
>> Lew
>>
>>
>
>Without looking at a map, I would say the tunnel (from Detroit) to
>Windsor goes SE and the bridge to Windsor goes East. So, I think
>everyone is right. It's been a while since I've been to Windsor. I might
>have heard you need a passport to go now, but I'm not positive.
>
>Bill
The bridge runs about 37 degrees off due north/south (roughly 337
degrees or 143 degrees, depending which direction you are headed) and
the tunnel runs about 5 degrees off (355 degrees or 175, depending
which way you are headed) with Windsor DEFINITELY on the south side.
As for the Passport, you need it to get back into the USA. It's an
American "homeland security" issue.
Lew Hodgett wrote:
> "Mike Marlow" wrote:
>
> <snip>
>> "I will never forgive you for making us move to Detroit!!"
> ----------------------------------
> Speaking as someone who has spent a fair amount of time in Metro
> Detroit, not only on business but on vacation, can only say, "Low
> Blow"
>
Vacation??? Lew - nobody vacations in Detroit! It's like vacationing in
Solvay...
--
-Mike-
[email protected]
On 1/13/11 12:44 AM, in article
[email protected], "Lew Hodgett"
<[email protected]> wrote:
>
> "Luigi Zanasi" wrote:
>
>> But Windsor Ontario, just south of Detroit is int Canada's banana
> belt.
> ------------------------------
> Remind me not to ask you to be navigator.<G>
>
> Windsor is East of downtown Detroit or was last time I was there.
I work in the Renaissance Center in downtown Detroit and look south across
the river to Windsor.
On 1/13/11 9:47 AM, in article [email protected],
"FrozenNorth" <[email protected]> wrote:
> On 1/13/11 9:44 AM, Bill wrote:
>> Lew Hodgett wrote:
>>> "Luigi Zanasi" wrote:
>>>
>>>> But Windsor Ontario, just south of Detroit is int Canada's banana
>>> belt.
>>> ------------------------------
>>> Remind me not to ask you to be navigator.<G>
>>>
>>> Windsor is East of downtown Detroit or was last time I was there.
>>>
>>> Lew
>>>
>>>
>>
>> Without looking at a map, I would say the tunnel (from Detroit) to
>> Windsor goes SE and the bridge to Windsor goes East. So, I think
>> everyone is right. It's been a while since I've been to Windsor. I might
>> have heard you need a passport to go now, but I'm not positive.
>>
> As an American you don't need a passport to get to Canada, but you will
> need it to get back home.
My "enhanced" Michigan driver's license works just fine. Doesn't your state
particpate in that program?
On 1/12/11 11:57 PM, in article
[email protected], "Lew Hodgett"
<[email protected]> wrote:
> "Mike Marlow" wrote:
>> Vacation??? Lew - nobody vacations in Detroit! It's like
>> vacationing in Solvay...
> -------------------
> Greenfield Village & the museum are worth a couple of days and Lake
> StClair is a good overnighter on your way to the North Channel at the
> top of Lake Huron.
>
> Joe Muirs downtown is/was a great fish house.
The Diego Rivera works at the DIA are impressive. And there is always
Motown.
There are several ethnic communities that have their own uniwue flavors. You
can't beat the Middle Eastern food in some of the Dearborn restaurants.
>
> Depends on what you are looking for.
Exactly right.
Windsor is a very confusing city for newcomers until you get it rhough you
head that the bridge, river and Detroit are due north of you.
"Robert Haar" <[email protected]> wrote in message
news:C954EE8B.4AD815%[email protected]...
I work in the Renaissance Center in downtown Detroit and look south across
the river to Windsor.
Windsor,
when you need to go "south of the border"
<[email protected]> wrote in message
news:[email protected]...
That depends a bit..Howard Avenue in Windsor runs parrallell to and
almost dead between John Dodge and Chrysler Drive, lining up with
Woodward.The Detroit/Windsor tunnel runs virtually North South, with
Windsor on the south side.
If you follow Michigan Ave due east, you will overshoot all of Windor
except for the small point between Peche Island and Belle Isle across
from the Windmill point light.. Which means virtually ALL of Winsor
is south od Michigan Ave.
Windsor IS east of Allen Park, Lincoln Park, Southgate,
Taylor,Melvindale, and Romulous, but is south (and east) of Dearborn
and Dearborn Heights as well as being virtually due south of Sterling
Heights, Madison Heights, Warren, Grosse Pointe, Hamtramck, and
Highland Park.
I would hope you travel, in a boat, **under** the bridge, at 90 degrees to
the traffic **on** the bridge.
"Lew Hodgett" <[email protected]> wrote in message
news:[email protected]...
Last time I sailed under the bridge, it was oriented East-West.
Lew
Windsor is East of downtown Detroit or was last time I was there.
Lew Hodgett wrote:
> "Mike Marlow" wrote:
>
> <snip>
>> "I will never forgive you for making us move to Detroit!!"
> ----------------------------------
> Speaking as someone who has spent a fair amount of time in Metro
> Detroit, not only on business but on vacation, can only say, "Low
> Blow"
>
> BTW, there is a major settlement of Arab speaking folks in Dearborn,
> or was the last time I was there.
The east side of Dearborn has the highest concentration of
middle-eastern people in the country. I've heard our government is aware
of this.
>
> Lew
>
>
In article <[email protected]>, "Lew Hodgett" <[email protected]> wrote:
>
>"Luigi Zanasi" wrote:
>
>> But Windsor Ontario, just south of Detroit is int Canada's banana
>belt.
>------------------------------
>Remind me not to ask you to be navigator.<G>
>
>Windsor is East of downtown Detroit or was last time I was there.
Ummm... maybe you should've looked at a map while you were there:
http://www.mapquest.com/maps?city=Windsor&country=Canada&zoom=10
Lew Hodgett wrote:
> "Luigi Zanasi" wrote:
>
>> But Windsor Ontario, just south of Detroit is int Canada's banana
> belt.
> ------------------------------
> Remind me not to ask you to be navigator.<G>
>
> Windsor is East of downtown Detroit or was last time I was there.
>
> Lew
>
>
Without looking at a map, I would say the tunnel (from Detroit) to
Windsor goes SE and the bridge to Windsor goes East. So, I think
everyone is right. It's been a while since I've been to Windsor. I might
have heard you need a passport to go now, but I'm not positive.
Bill
On 1/13/11 9:44 AM, Bill wrote:
> Lew Hodgett wrote:
>> "Luigi Zanasi" wrote:
>>
>>> But Windsor Ontario, just south of Detroit is int Canada's banana
>> belt.
>> ------------------------------
>> Remind me not to ask you to be navigator.<G>
>>
>> Windsor is East of downtown Detroit or was last time I was there.
>>
>> Lew
>>
>>
>
> Without looking at a map, I would say the tunnel (from Detroit) to
> Windsor goes SE and the bridge to Windsor goes East. So, I think
> everyone is right. It's been a while since I've been to Windsor. I might
> have heard you need a passport to go now, but I'm not positive.
>
As an American you don't need a passport to get to Canada, but you will
need it to get back home.
--
Froz...
The system will be down for 10 days for preventive maintenance.
On 1/13/2011 10:28 AM, Greg Neill wrote:
> FrozenNorth wrote:
>> As an American you don't need a passport to get to Canada, but you will
>> need it to get back home.
>
> Ah yes, Land of the free. "Show me your papers!"
Right, and letting anybody and everybody come into the country without proper
documentation is SUCH a good idea...
--
See Nad. See Nad go. Go Nad!
To reply, eat the taco.
http://www.flickr.com/photos/bbqboyee/
On 1/13/11 6:04 PM, Robert Haar wrote:
>
>
>
> On 1/13/11 9:47 AM, in article [email protected],
> "FrozenNorth"<[email protected]> wrote:
>
>> On 1/13/11 9:44 AM, Bill wrote:
>>> Lew Hodgett wrote:
>>>> "Luigi Zanasi" wrote:
>>>>
>>>>> But Windsor Ontario, just south of Detroit is int Canada's banana
>>>> belt.
>>>> ------------------------------
>>>> Remind me not to ask you to be navigator.<G>
>>>>
>>>> Windsor is East of downtown Detroit or was last time I was there.
>>>>
>>>> Lew
>>>>
>>>>
>>>
>>> Without looking at a map, I would say the tunnel (from Detroit) to
>>> Windsor goes SE and the bridge to Windsor goes East. So, I think
>>> everyone is right. It's been a while since I've been to Windsor. I might
>>> have heard you need a passport to go now, but I'm not positive.
>>>
>> As an American you don't need a passport to get to Canada, but you will
>> need it to get back home.
>
> My "enhanced" Michigan driver's license works just fine. Doesn't your state
> particpate in that program?
>
You replied to me, I am Canadian, need a passport to get to the US, not
to get back home.
--
Froz...
The system will be down for 10 days for preventive maintenance.
On Wed, 12 Jan 2011 21:44:17 -0800, "Lew Hodgett"
<[email protected]> wrote:
>
>"Luigi Zanasi" wrote:
>
>> But Windsor Ontario, just south of Detroit is int Canada's banana
>belt.
>------------------------------
>Remind me not to ask you to be navigator.<G>
>
>Windsor is East of downtown Detroit or was last time I was there.
>
>Lew
>
That depends a bit..Howard Avenue in Windsor runs parrallell to and
almost dead between John Dodge and Chrysler Drive, lining up with
Woodward.The Detroit/Windsor tunnel runs virtually North South, with
Windsor on the south side.
If you follow Michigan Ave due east, you will overshoot all of Windor
except for the small point between Peche Island and Belle Isle across
from the Windmill point light.. Which means virtually ALL of Winsor
is south od Michigan Ave.
Windsor IS east of Allen Park, Lincoln Park, Southgate,
Taylor,Melvindale, and Romulous, but is south (and east) of Dearborn
and Dearborn Heights as well as being virtually due south of Sterling
Heights, Madison Heights, Warren, Grosse Pointe, Hamtramck, and
Highland Park.