Thought you would like to know.
Lew
-------------------------------------
Sometime this year, we taxpayers will again receive another
'Economic Stimulus' payment.
This is indeed a very exciting program, and I'll explain it by using
a Q & A format:
Q. What is an 'Economic Stimulus' payment ?
A. It is money that the government will send to taxpayers.
Q.. Where will the government get this money ?
A. From taxpayers.
Q. So the government is giving me back my own money ?
A. Only a smidgen of it.
Q. What is the purpose of this payment ?
A. The plan is for you to use the money to purchase a high-definition
TV
set, thus stimulating the economy.
Q. But isn't that stimulating the economy of China ?
A. Shut up.
Below is some helpful advice on how to best help the USA economy by
spending
your stimulus cheque wisely:
* If you spend the stimulus money at Walmart or Target, the money
will go
to China , Taiwan or Sri Lanka .
* If you spend it on gasoline, your money will go to the Arabs.
* If you purchase a computer, it will go to India , Taiwan or China
.
* If you purchase fruit and vegetables, it will go to Mexico ,
Honduras
and Guatemala ..
* If you buy an efficient car, it will go to Japan or Korea .
* If you purchase useless stuff, it will go to Taiwan .
* If you pay your credit cards off, or buy shares, it will go to
management bonuses and they will hide it offshore.
Instead, keep the money in the America by:
1) Spending it at garage sales, or
2) Going to night clubs, or
3) Spending it on prostitutes, or
4) Beer or whisky or
5) Tattoos.
(These are the only American businesses still operating in America )
Conclusion:
Be patriotic - go to a night club with a tattooed prostitute who you
met at
a garage sale and drink beer day and night !
No need to thank me, I'm just glad I could be of help.
"Doug Miller" <[email protected]> wrote in message
>>Be patriotic - go to a night club with a tattooed prostitute who you met
>>at
>>a garage sale and drink beer day and night !
> Which will further stimulate the American economy by causing me to spend
> what
> little money I have remaining on a divorce lawyer...
An ultimately, the advantage is that you'll keep stimulating the econony by
continued alimony payments.
Unless you are a Retired Serviceman! Then the "Spousal Support Act" comes
into play. Call it what you may, but it is still Alimony. AND, it doesn't
end just because your "Ex: remarries!
DAMHIK
Bill
"Upscale" <[email protected]> wrote in message
news:[email protected]...
>
> "HeyBub" <[email protected]> wrote in message
>>> An ultimately, the advantage is that you'll keep stimulating the
>>> econony by continued alimony payments.
>
>> Or you could move to a state that doesn't have alimony (Texas is one -
>> there are others) and file for divorce there.
>
> Do you have to be a resident of Texas for a predefined period or some
> other precondition before you can get that alimony-less support? I'm
> wondering why more don't take advantage of that? Or, maybe they do.
>
"HeyBub" <[email protected]> wrote in message
>> An ultimately, the advantage is that you'll keep stimulating the
>> econony by continued alimony payments.
> Or you could move to a state that doesn't have alimony (Texas is one -
> there are others) and file for divorce there.
Do you have to be a resident of Texas for a predefined period or some other
precondition before you can get that alimony-less support? I'm wondering why
more don't take advantage of that? Or, maybe they do.
In article <[email protected]>, "Lew Hodgett" <[email protected]> wrote:
[...]
>
>Be patriotic - go to a night club with a tattooed prostitute who you met at
>a garage sale and drink beer day and night !
Which will further stimulate the American economy by causing me to spend what
little money I have remaining on a divorce lawyer...
In article <[email protected]>, "Upscale" <[email protected]> wrote:
>
>"Doug Miller" <[email protected]> wrote in message
>>>Be patriotic - go to a night club with a tattooed prostitute who you met
>>>at
>>>a garage sale and drink beer day and night !
>
>> Which will further stimulate the American economy by causing me to spend what
>> little money I have remaining on a divorce lawyer...
>
>An ultimately, the advantage is that you'll keep stimulating the econony by
>continued alimony payments.
That's on a state-by-state basis. Some states allow the granting of alimony as
part of a divorce decree, some don't. Mine doesn't.
HeyBub ,
that has not worked for a very long time.law changes back in the 1990's.
len
"HeyBub" wrote in message
news:[email protected]...
Upscale wrote:
> "Doug Miller" <[email protected]> wrote in message
>>> Be patriotic - go to a night club with a tattooed prostitute who
>>> you met at
>>> a garage sale and drink beer day and night !
>
>> Which will further stimulate the American economy by causing me to
>> spend what
>> little money I have remaining on a divorce lawyer...
>
> An ultimately, the advantage is that you'll keep stimulating the
> econony by continued alimony payments.
Or you could move to a state that doesn't have alimony (Texas is one - there
are others) and file for divorce there.
I read once about a couple who flew to the Dominican Republic right after
Christmas to spend New Year's there. While in DR, they got a divorce. The
returned after the new year and re-married. The money they saved in taxes by
being single at year-end paid for the trip.
They did this every year.
Upscale wrote:
> "Doug Miller" <[email protected]> wrote in message
>>> Be patriotic - go to a night club with a tattooed prostitute who
>>> you met at
>>> a garage sale and drink beer day and night !
>
>> Which will further stimulate the American economy by causing me to
>> spend what
>> little money I have remaining on a divorce lawyer...
>
> An ultimately, the advantage is that you'll keep stimulating the
> econony by continued alimony payments.
Or you could move to a state that doesn't have alimony (Texas is one - there
are others) and file for divorce there.
I read once about a couple who flew to the Dominican Republic right after
Christmas to spend New Year's there. While in DR, they got a divorce. The
returned after the new year and re-married. The money they saved in taxes by
being single at year-end paid for the trip.
They did this every year.