Hi all,
Just wanted to know what you all thought the best tool would be to
carve the turkey with since I don't have an electric knife? I ask
because with regard to food I'm not extactly a neander, more of a
Normite.
I was thinking a recip saw might work well...but all suggestions are
welcome and should be tried.
But, I thought I should ask the wreck and poll the collective
wisdom...
Layne
Sound like the best idea so far! But, I think it would be best to do
the "cooking" at a relative's house instead...one you don't get along
with too well...
Layne
On Thu, 24 Nov 2005 19:59:44 -0500, Robatoy <[email protected]>
wrote:
>Stuff the bird with potassium nitrate and mix with canola oil.
>Mix carefully, toss in some bread (to hold it all together), some sage.
>Put in oven..and leave the building.
>Go to your neighbours...no..not the ones living immediately next to you...a few
>doors down.
>Wait for the unmistakable sound that the turkey has de-boned itself.
>Collect and eat.
>.
>.
>.
>.
>.
>.
>.
>.
>.
>.
>.
>I mean.. if we're talking silly, let's talk silly...
"Layne" <[email protected]> wrote in message
news:[email protected]...
> Hi all,
>
> Just wanted to know what you all thought the best tool would be to
> carve the turkey with since I don't have an electric knife? I ask
> because with regard to food I'm not extactly a neander, more of a
> Normite.
>
> I was thinking a recip saw might work well...but all suggestions are
> welcome and should be tried.
>
> But, I thought I should ask the wreck and poll the collective
> wisdom...
Blowtorch and a lathe. Skew chisel for the meat, bowl gouge for the
stuffing. Use a spokeshave every now and then to undercut the bones.
- Owen -
On Thu, 24 Nov 2005 17:42:59 GMT, Layne <[email protected]> wrote:
>Hi all,
>
>Just wanted to know what you all thought the best tool would be to
>carve the turkey with since I don't have an electric knife? I ask
>because with regard to food I'm not extactly a neander, more of a
>Normite.
>
>I was thinking a recip saw might work well...but all suggestions are
>welcome and should be tried.
>
>But, I thought I should ask the wreck and poll the collective
>wisdom...
>
>Layne
plasma...
mac
Please remove splinters before emailing
>> I recently had the opportunity to cut up a 26 pound frozen turkey and
>> thought I might offer helpful hints to any one considering doing this.
>>
>> Tools:
>> 1 Sawzall with 12 inch blade. (Extra blades are also helpful)
>> 2 Pry bar, large screwdriver or cleaver.
>> 3 Vice Grips
>> 4 Solid work surface.
>> 5 Very large clamp
>> 6 ladder
>> 7 band aids, tourniquet needle and thread and various first aid items
>> 8 Extension cord
>> 9 Aluminum foil, saran wrap, plastic bags etc. (very important for them to
>> actually be in the house before you start)
>> 10 Turkey
>> 11 Dogs (to help with cleanup)
>> 12 Alcohol of some sort.
>> 13 More alcohol.
>> 14 Plastic gloves if you are squeamish or if your hands being numb bothers
>> you.
>> 15 Hair net or shower cap
>> 16 Protective clothing
>> 17 Hammer and nails or a screw gun and screws
>> 18, wood filler, sandpaper, stain to match the color of the table you are
>> cutting on etc.
>> These items are merely suggestions, actually needs may vary.
>>
>> Objective;
>> Cutting a turkey in pieces and freezing the pieces for future meals for your
>> dog.
>>
>> Procedure;
>> Choose an appropriate work surface.
>> Put on protective gear, clothing, tarps, and whatever other gear needed.
>>
>> Make sure alcohol is within reach but Do Not, start drinking yet.
>>
>> Secure turkey to table with clamps, screws, nails etc.
>> Hint, no matter how sincere they appear, do not let your dog help hold the
>> turkey!
>> Use the vice grip to pull that wire thingy that holds the legs together
>> from the bird.
>>
>> Load blade in to the sawzall.
>>
>> Make incisions across breast from neck to butt.
>> If you desire the gizzards frozen in the cavity to come out in one piece you
>> will have to limit your depth of cut.
>>
>> Make incisions at right angles to the primary cut. I made three secondary
>> incisions. The size of the cuts will depend on the size and number of your
>> dogs.
>> I have a large dog and a little one that eats a lot so the pieces cut out to
>> about 3/4 pound each. For smaller dogs, make smaller cuts. If you have a toy
>> anything, proceed to Tools, numbers 12 and13 and figure out why you are even
>> here.
>>
>> Once the breast side of the turkey is scored, you can then use the pry bar
>> to break off the pieces and set aside until finished.
>>
>> You can also use this first break to clean the turkey bits from your hair,
>> eyes etc.
>> Now is the time to wonder WTF you were thinking about when you had this idea
>> and to start drinking the alcohol.
>>
>> You will notice that your normally skittish dog, is suddenly not afraid of
>> the load noise the saw is making while bits of meat are flying through the
>> air. Do not let your dog close enough to lick the saw.
>> You might also want to keep the doors closed because every time the turkey
>> hits the floor your dog will try to pick up the entire bird and run outside
>> with it.
>>
>> You must proceed with caution, because a sawzall is a very powerful tool
>> designed to quickly cut through wood, steel etc and when covered with raw
>> meat it gets a little slippery. Since it is very powerful and easily cuts
>> through frozen meat and bones, remember that it can also easily cut through
>> your table top, fingers, shoes knife handles etc.
>>
>> Run warm water over your fingers to get the feeling back and start to cut
>> again. When the turkey is completely cut up, you can wash your hands and
>> relax for a few minutes.
>>
>> You will now wrap and freeze all of the pieces of frozen bird. This is not a
>> good time to discover you are out of wrap. Running to the store at 11pm to
>> buy an emergency roll of wrap while your dogs guard the bird is not a good
>> thing.
>>
>> At this time you will need to clean up everything that your dog cannot
>> reach. You will also need to use the ladder to clean the raw meat from the
>> ceiling, walls etc.
>> Remember to unplug the saw before cleaning the meat off the blade, guides,
>> handles and power cord.
>>
>> I do not recommend trying this at home. It sounded like a good idea when I
>> heard about the buy one get one free turkey promotion at the supermarket, but
>> didn¹t materialize as I had imagined.
>>
>>
>> max
> "Layne" <[email protected]> wrote in message
> news:[email protected]...
>> Hi all,
>>
>> Just wanted to know what you all thought the best tool would be to
>> carve the turkey with since I don't have an electric knife? I ask
>> because with regard to food I'm not extactly a neander, more of a
>> Normite.
>>
>> I was thinking a recip saw might work well...but all suggestions are
>> welcome and should be tried.
>>
>> But, I thought I should ask the wreck and poll the collective
>> wisdom...
>>
>> Layne
>
> Somebody posted this earlier, but it wasn't advertised as a turkey cutter. I
> think it could very well be used for one.
> http://inv.cwwood.com/q/webinv/008760=iform,4620,0S0690,,list,,,20052633
>
> FMB
>
>
Hand grenade.
--
Jim McLaughlin
Reply address is deliberately munged.
If you really need to reply directly, try:
jimdotmclaughlinatcomcastdotcom
And you know it is a dotnet not a dotcom
address.
"Layne" <[email protected]> wrote in message
news:[email protected]...
> Hi all,
>
> Just wanted to know what you all thought the best tool would be to
> carve the turkey with since I don't have an electric knife? I ask
> because with regard to food I'm not extactly a neander, more of a
> Normite.
>
> I was thinking a recip saw might work well...but all suggestions are
> welcome and should be tried.
>
> But, I thought I should ask the wreck and poll the collective
> wisdom...
>
> Layne
"Layne" <[email protected]> wrote in message
news:[email protected]...
> Hi all,
>
> Just wanted to know what you all thought the best tool would be to
> carve the turkey with since I don't have an electric knife? I ask
> because with regard to food I'm not extactly a neander, more of a
> Normite.
>
> I was thinking a recip saw might work well...but all suggestions are
> welcome and should be tried.
>
> But, I thought I should ask the wreck and poll the collective
> wisdom...
>
> Layne
One word ....................
HUSQVARNA!
Don't forget your personal protective equipment.
Let the dogs do the clean up.
Steve
Layne <[email protected]> wrote in news:slubo19vn34qup3k7nuaihehjkpsm4aff8@
4ax.com:
> Hi all,
>
> Just wanted to know what you all thought the best tool would be to
> carve the turkey with since I don't have an electric knife? I ask
> because with regard to food I'm not extactly a neander, more of a
> Normite.
>
> I was thinking a recip saw might work well...but all suggestions are
> welcome and should be tried.
>
> But, I thought I should ask the wreck and poll the collective
> wisdom...
>
> Layne
freeze bird first, then bandsaw
>
"Layne" <[email protected]> wrote in message
news:[email protected]...
> Hi all,
>
> Just wanted to know what you all thought the best tool would be to
> carve the turkey with since I don't have an electric knife? I ask
> because with regard to food I'm not extactly a neander, more of a
> Normite.
>
> I was thinking a recip saw might work well...but all suggestions are
> welcome and should be tried.
>
> But, I thought I should ask the wreck and poll the collective
> wisdom...
>
> Layne
Somebody posted this earlier, but it wasn't advertised as a turkey cutter. I
think it could very well be used for one.
http://inv.cwwood.com/q/webinv/008760=iform,4620,0S0690,,list,,,20052633
FMB
I just got out the cordless SAZALL for the task! I always end up at all
family gatherings cutting the turkey or ham,, This will probably put and
end to me being the exclusive "Slicer".
Don Dando
Do
"SteveB" <[email protected]> wrote in message
news:Dsnhf.1643$1x.658@fed1read06...
>
> "Layne" <[email protected]> wrote in message
> news:[email protected]...
> > Hi all,
> >
> > Just wanted to know what you all thought the best tool would be to
> > carve the turkey with since I don't have an electric knife? I ask
> > because with regard to food I'm not extactly a neander, more of a
> > Normite.
> >
> > I was thinking a recip saw might work well...but all suggestions are
> > welcome and should be tried.
> >
> > But, I thought I should ask the wreck and poll the collective
> > wisdom...
> >
> > Layne
>
> One word ....................
>
> HUSQVARNA!
>
> Don't forget your personal protective equipment.
>
> Let the dogs do the clean up.
>
> Steve
>
>
<<Beyond question this is a job for a radial arm saw and an Incra Fence.>>
Everyone knows a RAS is far too dangerous for carving a turkey, especially
if you're ripping it rather than cross cutting.
However, when it comes to dealing with the leftovers, you can't beat a
turkey sandwich made from paper thin slices carved on a Harbor Freight 7"
jointer.
Lee
--
To e-mail, replace "bucketofspam" with "dleegordon"
_________________________________
Lee Gordon
http://www.leegordonproductions.com
On 11/24/2005 12:42 PM Layne mumbled something about the following:
> Hi all,
>
> Just wanted to know what you all thought the best tool would be to
> carve the turkey with since I don't have an electric knife? I ask
> because with regard to food I'm not extactly a neander, more of a
> Normite.
>
> I was thinking a recip saw might work well...but all suggestions are
> welcome and should be tried.
>
> But, I thought I should ask the wreck and poll the collective
> wisdom...
>
> Layne
My choice would be the cordless sawzall, m'self.
--
Odinn
RCOS #7 SENS BS ???
"The more I study religions the more I am convinced that man never
worshiped anything but himself." -- Sir Richard Francis Burton
Reeky's unofficial homepage ... http://www.reeky.org
'03 FLHTI ........... http://www.sloanclan.org/gallery/ElectraGlide
'97 VN1500D ......... http://www.sloanclan.org/gallery/VulcanClassic
Atlanta Biker Net ... http://www.atlantabiker.net
Vulcan Riders Assoc . http://www.vulcanriders.org
rot13 [email protected] to reply
In article <[email protected]>,
Layne <[email protected]> wrote:
> Hi all,
>
> Just wanted to know what you all thought the best tool would be to
> carve the turkey with since I don't have an electric knife? I ask
> because with regard to food I'm not extactly a neander, more of a
> Normite.
>
> I was thinking a recip saw might work well...but all suggestions are
> welcome and should be tried.
>
> But, I thought I should ask the wreck and poll the collective
> wisdom...
>
> Layne
So far, all of you have missed the obvious:
Stuff the bird with potassium nitrate and mix with canola oil.
Mix carefully, toss in some bread (to hold it all together), some sage.
Put in oven..and leave the building.
Go to your neighbours...no..not the ones living immediately next to you...a few
doors down.
Wait for the unmistakable sound that the turkey has de-boned itself.
Collect and eat.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
I mean.. if we're talking silly, let's talk silly...
Layne <[email protected]> writes:
> Just wanted to know what you all thought the best tool would be to
> carve the turkey with since I don't have an electric knife? I ask
> because with regard to food I'm not extactly a neander, more of a
> Normite.
Bandsaw! Use the Tyson Slice-master and your "Poultry-Only" blade.
--
Sending unsolicited commercial e-mail to this account incurs a fee of
$500 per message, and acknowledges the legality of this contract.
There are bandsaw blades explicitely made for cutting meat.
Layne wrote:
> Hi all,
>
> Just wanted to know what you all thought the best tool would be to
> carve the turkey with since I don't have an electric knife? I ask
> because with regard to food I'm not extactly a neander, more of a
> Normite.
>
> I was thinking a recip saw might work well...but all suggestions are
> welcome and should be tried.
>
> But, I thought I should ask the wreck and poll the collective
> wisdom...
>
> Layne
"Layne" <[email protected]> wrote in message
news:[email protected]...
> Hi all,
>
> Just wanted to know what you all thought the best tool would be to
> carve the turkey with since I don't have an electric knife? I ask
> because with regard to food I'm not extactly a neander, more of a
> Normite.
>
> I was thinking a recip saw might work well...but all suggestions are
> welcome and should be tried.
>
> But, I thought I should ask the wreck and poll the collective
> wisdom...
>
> Layne
Well, you gotta consider the cleanup, too. Will the recip saw draw all sorts
of bone & skin chunks into the mechanism? If yes, you might wanna have a
spray can of degreaser around. It's also handy for cleaning the childrens'
faces.